Tuesday, 5 June 2012

Trust, faith, fear...


Yes, it has been a while since my last post.  My apologies my readers.  It’s been a year this month since my “trial separation” that ultimately lead to the permanent end.  I knew that this milestone would be a difficult time of reflection for me.  Trying to release the “what if’s” the “should haves” … it’s been a challenge for a thinker like myself.  I would like to say life is content and although it is, I have been contemplating much over the last couple of weeks.

Mainly trust, faith, risk….

When you take a risk, trust and faith go right along with it. 

My trouble right now is being brave enough to take some risks.  Aside from my dating disasters, my crazy activities and strange happenings….I am talking real risk.  Heart and soul risks.  I will be the first to admit I am scared to death.  (click on the link below to read my last post about fear)


How does such a strong willed person let fear paralyze her?  Why do I allow the past to continue to control my future?  How do you finally face the fear and move forward into the brilliant life that is waiting?  My instinct and the quiet voice that guides me says “time.”  Lots of time.  Time will bring forth boldness, perspective and freedom. 

Not to worry…the pain of a broken heart is healing at a speed that frightens me to a point, the memories have become more of a comfort than heartache and the weeping has ceased.  The anger has dissolved.  I was out running errands the other day and saw him in his truck.  I glanced up and thought to myself, “Oh, that’s (insert name here).”  I didn’t feel the sadness, the bitterness, the anger, the devastation of the past.  It was such an odd feeling to not feel, that I actually pulled my car over and analyzed the encounter. I was surprised; confused, even felt a bit guilty that seeing him didn’t affect me.  It confounded me that in one passing moment, I came to the conclusion that the past year of turmoil had come to an end.  The pain eased, just like I had known it would.

So after the pain comes the fear of risk. 

 I have been afraid to change because my entire life was built around what I thought was forever.  What I thought I needed, what I thought I wanted, suddenly swept out from under my feet and what’s left is real and raw and somewhat overwhelming.  The excitement and exhilaration of a new life.  The freedom to finally be who I was meant to be.  The knowledge that yes, I am ok on my own.  The flip side…the fear of being enough, fear of being alone, fear of rejection, fear of totally fucking up my kids, fear of the unknown.  It’s a delicate balance of rushing head first into the light and being jerked back by terror and insecurities.

One of my favourite quotes is “who would I be if I took the limits away?”  I don’t know who wrote that or where I even heard it, but it definitely resonates with me right now at this point in my life.  I don’t want limits anymore. 

It’s easy to play it safe.  It’s easy to stay in my pajamas and hide away in my living room.  I don’t want easy anymore. 

I want to live with an open heart and spirit.  There is an unstoppable force driving me towards it.  It’s where I am supposed to be.  I truly believe that I am being gently nudged out of my comfort zone by the people in my life and the choices I make.  Yes, it’s uncomfortable, even prickly at times, but oh so amazing! 

I take a risk every time I write.  I feel the fear and write anyway.  It eases my soul and releases the jumble of thoughts that run through my brain.  Without it, I am not sure I would be so far into my journey. 
So to you my amazing readers…thank you.  Because without you, my writing would just be words. 












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